Emotional Abuse at Oak Hill Montessori Community School

What happened?

Our daughter’s teacher, Emily Bowar, was abusing our daughter. Ms. Bowar used a campaign of isolation and public humiliation, as well as denying access to recess, and putting our daughter in physical harm to abuse our child emotionally.

Ms. Bowar was placing our daughter in the hallway, alone. Sometimes multiple times a day. While there is no justification for child abuse, the excuses given by Ms. Bowar, and the Executive Director, were that our daughter was “emotionally dysregulated” and had “thrown things.” In almost three years at the school, none of these supposed issues were addressed to us until we reported the abuse to the state.

This may, on the surface, seem like a minor thing. However, according to Oak Hill’s student / parent handbook, students are not to be left alone during the disciplinary process. In addition, leaving children alone as a disciplinary tactic is isolation. Isolation is hazing. Isolation is emotional abuse.

While in the hallway, our daughter was forced to sit on “the bench.” This bench used to sit just inside an unlocked exit door, with full access for any student to leave into the elements, head toward Hodgson Road, or just wander off.

There was also clear instruction given to the other adults in the school that any student found on this bench was not to be engaged. This furthers the isolation, and the abuse.

Finally, Ms. Bowar would put a sign near the bench that announced that any child on this bench was, in fact, not to be engaged with, as they were being punished. This is public humiliation. A 21st century “dunce” cap. Public humiliation is hazing. Public humiliation is abuse.

This was not a one-time event. This happened day, after day, after day. Ms. Bowar made a claim that our daughter needed to be screened for disorders such as ADHD and / or autism, due to the signs she was seeing in class. These signs, as defined by Ms. Bowar, were:

  • Withdrawal from friends

  • Aggression, anger, or hostility

  • Rebellious or defiant behavior

  • Inappropriate emotional displays

  • Loss of interest in school

As it turns out, these are signs and symptoms of emotional abuse, as defined by the Mayo Clinic.

We do not define this as emotional abuse, experts do. You can learn more at the links below.

What is emoitonal abuse?

  • What is emotional abuse?

    Emotional abuse is any type of abuse that involves the continual emotional mistreatment of a child. It's sometimes called psychological abuse. Emotional abuse can involve deliberately trying to scare, humiliate, isolate or ignore a child.

    NSPCC Emotional Abuse Page

  • Hazing

    There are three components that define hazing:

    • It occurs in a group context

    • Humiliating, degrading, or endangering behavior

    • Happens regardless of an individual’s willingness to participate

    Stop Hazing.org

  • Is this really emotional abuse?

    According to the National Association of Elementary School Principals, yes it is.

    Forms of isolation include being sent to the principal’s office, being placed in the hallway, or having their desk moved away from others. These are forms of isolation that do not improve performance. Rather these actions create hostility, shame, and fear.

    NAESP - Beware Emotional Abuse